Tuesday, 21 May 2013

My dotage...

I think I stepped into its perimeter today. :(

Regular readers of my whining and whingeings will know I've recently been getting hammered by one cold/sickness/chest infection after another. Today, I woke feeling, not ill exactly, but like someone had stuck a syringe into my body and sucked out every last dreg of energy. I'm talking 'husk' here people!

Tell me, when you were young (or indeed if you're still young!), did you have an elderly relative (usually female) who could always be relied upon to suggest a cure for every ailment? In my case, this relative was my nan.

Some of her suggestions were firmly in the 'dodgy' category, such as sleeping with a collection of corks in order to ease rheumatism, or strapping half an onion to 'cure' a painful ear (!)

No, I haven't tried those particular 'Top Tips'.

Failing a specific 'remedy' such as those listed above, Nan had one more weapon in her armoury. The Big Gun. The 'never-fails' cure-all. I am referring to, of course, a Universal solution to hasten the end of every malady known the man/womankind. Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present...*drumroll*

 'The Tonic'!!!
 

Yes. That's what I bought from the chemist today. A fecking tonic! I swear, on the bus ride home, as I clutched my shameful purchase to my chest, I could almost smell the snake oil oozing through the packaging.

You can mock me if you like, but one day something like this will probably happen to you too!





2 comments:

  1. Well, the big question now is... How are you feeling? Who knows what works? When I get laryngitis, I try an old Indian remedy: slippery elm bark that you boil into a tea. Disgusting, but it works. Get well soon - it's spring, for crying out loud. We're not supposed to be sick til next year. : )

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hey, Kimberly :)

    The weird thing is, I think The Tonic might be doing some good. Perhaps it's the placebo effect but I don't feel quite so on-my-knees weary today. I'm almost walking upright again. Yay! :D
    If I can remain free of illness for the next month, I reckon I'll soon be full of vim and vigour again. :) Hasn't 2013 been a sick year so far? (Sick as in ill, I mean.) :)

    ReplyDelete

Total Pageviews