Thursday, 4 September 2014

Cissy and Ada...

Hey guys. Have you ever met Cissy and Ada?

[] Oh, they do make me titter! Perhaps they never made it over to your side of the Great Pond?

But I digress...the reason I posted a picture of these two gorgeous girls(!) (aka Les Dawson and Roy Baraclough) is because I'm seeing a worrying rise in incidences of a particularly unpleasant disease on my news feeds. Namely, an epidemic of 'Too-far-up-my-own-ass syndrome.'  (Although you might know it better as 'Chucking-Teddy-Out-Of-The-Cot' disease, or 'Handbags-At-Dawn-itis.')

This distressing condition seems to be afflicting more and more authors, causing them to lash out and bad-mouth their readers--the very people who gave them their success--in the most public of places. Not a nice thing to witness.
What can we do about it? How an we protect our favorite authors from falling foul of this terrible affliction?

First off, do not attempt to engage the author while she/he is foaming at the mouth. Instead, back away to a safe distance and watch the fallout as it comes raining down. No one is gonna come out of this smelling of roses.

The best treatment is prevention.

Will you do something for me, my friends? If you ever see my ego swelling to an unnatural size, PLEASE stick a pin in me asap or, alternatively, slap me about the face with a wet cod/salmon until I return to my senses.

Just for the record, you can ask me anything, anytime you like, okay? I love talking with you guys! <3

Right. That ends today's sermon. Enjoy the sun, my lovelies!

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